Muslim Shaadiyan Der Kyun Ho Rahi Hain? Aaj Ke Masail Ke Islami Hal

🎧 Want to listen instead? [Watch the full video here]

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu.

Chalo Khul Ke Baat Karte Hain — Itni Muslim Shadiyan Delay Kyun Ho Rahi Hain?

Kabhi aas paas dekha hai aur socha hai…

“Sab log itna late kyun ho rahe hain shadi karne mein aaj kal?”

Ya kabhi khud se chupke se poocha,

“Kya mera number kabhi aayega?”

Toh suno, tum akeli nahi ho.

Ye delay, har taraf hai.

Acche, deendar musalmaan.

Achi adab wali behnein.

Seedha raasta chalne ki koshish karte hue bhai.

Lekin nikah?

Lagta hai jaise hamesha door ka sapna hai.

Toh chalo baat karte hain.

Ilzam ke saath nahi, balki hikmat ke saath.

Frustration ke saath nahi, balki umeed ke saath.

Pressure Cooker Jo Humne Khud Banaya Hai

Sabse pehle… khul ke keh dete hain.

Humne shadi ko bohot mushkil bana diya hai.

Lavish shaadi ke expectations.

“He must earn itna paisa (aadmi ko itna kamana chahiye)”, ya “she must look a certain way (aurat ko aise khoobsurat dikhna chahiye)”…

Ye sab filters humne laga diye hain, jo Nabi (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) ne kabhi nahi lagaye.

Shadi, hamare pyaare Nabi (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) ki sunnah, hamesha simple thi.

Aur aaj?

Humne us sukoon ko mushkil kar diya hai.

Aur Nabi (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) ne kaha:

“Jab tum kisi ke deen aur akhlaaq se raazi ho jao, toh uska nikah karwa do. Agar aisa nahi karoge, toh zameen mein fitna aur bohot saari fasad paida hogi.”
(Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1084)

Na koi job title ka zikr.

Na rang ka, na wedding ka glamour ka (shadi ko shaan-o-shauqat ke tareeke se karne ka nahi).

Sirf deen aur akhlaaq. Yeh hai Sunnah.

Haan, ye hadith Da’if (weak) hai, lekin iska lesson bohot relevant hai, especially aaj ke zamane mein jab fitne har taraf hain.

Hamein chahiye ke halal tareeqe se apne aap aur apni naslein bachayein.

Logon ko khush karne ke bajaye Allah ko raazi karne ki koshish karein, kyunke duniya ke standards toh roz badalte rehte hain.

Delays Hamesha Apni Marzi Se Nahi Hote

Ab haqeeqat mante hain, kabhi kabhi delay (der) isliye hota hai ke insaan koshish karta hai… aur phir bhi koi nahi milta.

Kuch log reject hote hain sirf height, paise, ya skin color ke basis pe.

Kuch ready hote hain… lekin unke families ready nahi hote.

Ya culture rukaawat ban jata hai.

Aur kuch log darr se ruk jaate hain.

Talaaq ka darr.

Ya apne maa-baap ya kisi rishtedar jaise toote hue rishte dekh kar failure (na kaami) ka darr.

Ye sab feelings (jazbaat) bhaari (heavy) hain. Aur bilkul valid (sahi) hain.

Lekin main yeh kehna chahti hoon: Allah sab dekhte hain. Allah sab sunte hain. Allah sab jaante hain.

“Tumhara Rabb tumse nafrat nahi karta, aur na hi tumhein chhod diya hai.”
(Surah Ad-Duhaa 93:3)

Toh delays ko apni pehchaan mat banao.

Unko hikmat aur Islam ke zariye solve karne ki koshish karo.

Ab Kya Kar Sakte Hain? — Islami Solutions (Hal)

Chalo simple aur practical baat karte hain, Sunnah ke mutabiq:

1. Process Ko Simple Banao

Saari extra cheezein chhod do.

Bas wahi cheezein priority (tarjeeh/ zyada zaruri) banao jo Allah aur Rasool (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) ne important (aham) batayi hain: Deen aur akhlaaq.

“Sabse acchi shadi wo hoti hai jo sabse zyada aasaan hoti hai.”
(Sunan Abu Dawud 2117)

Walima banquet hall mein karna zaroori nahi.

Nikah ke liye fancy gold invitation chhodo.

Simple rakho. Blessed (barakah wali) banao.

2. Sahi Logon Ko Involve Karo, Sirf Zyada Logon Ko Nahi

Har kisi aunty/uncle ya har random rishta ko involve karna zaroori nahi.

Taqwa wale logon ko involve (shamil) karo.

Koi bharosemand imam, mentor (sarparist), ya koi sincere (mukhlas) shaadi shuda couple (joda).

Har koi acha mashwara nahi deta.

Quran hame bohat kuch sikhata hai, aur mukhtalif situations ki aayaat hum apni zindagi ke safar mein apply kar sakte hain.

Allah ne kaha hai:

“Aur unse mashwara lo. Phir jab faisla kar lo, toh Allah par bharosa rakho.”
(Surah Al-Imran 3:159)

3. Apne Dil Aur Dimagh Ki Hifazat (Protect) Karo

Delays (deri) kabhi kabhi ghaflat aur ghalat raaston ka sabab ban sakte hain.

Lekin Islam kehta hai, chup reh kar takleef na uthao.

Du’a maango. Proactive raho. Apna dil protect karo.

Nabi ﷺ ne farmaya:

“Jo tum mein se shadi karne ki salahiyat rakhta ho, wo zaroor shadi kare. Kyunke wo aankhon ko neeche karne aur apni haya ki hifazat karne ka zariya hai. Aur jo shadi nahi kar sakta, wo roze rakhe, kyunke roza uski shahwat ko kam kar deta hai.”
(Sahih al-Bukhari 5066, Sahih Muslim 1400)

Roza. Focus (tawajjo). Du’a.

Yeh backup plans nahi hain.

Yeh soul savers (rooh ki hifazat karne wale) hain.

4. Nikah Ko Sunnah Ke Tor Par Samajhiye, Status Nahi

Shadi koi trophy nahi hai jo jeetni hai.

Ye zimmedari hai. Partnership (sharakat dari) hai.

Image ya pride ke liye shadi delay karna, ye Allah ki fitrah ke khilaf hai jo Unhone hum mein daali hai.

Ek Uplifting Reminder Har Intezaar Karne Wale Dil Ke Liye

Agar tum koshish kar rahi ho… intezaar kar rahi ho… aur sochti ho ke shayad tum mein koi kami hai…

Toh please yeh yaad rakhna:

Tum peeche nahi ho.

Tum bhulayi nahi gayi ho.

Ho sakta hai Allah tumhari shadi isliye delay kar rahe hain, taake tumhein ghalat insaan se bachayein.

Ya tumhare dil ko taiyaar kar rahe hain, us shohar ke liye jo shayad aaj kisi kone mein baith kar tumhare liye dua kar raha hai.

Aur is baat ko kabhi underestimate (kam samajhna) mat karna:

“Ho sakta hai tum kisi cheez ko nafrat se dekho jabke wo tumhare liye acchi ho, aur ho sakta hai tum kisi cheez ko pasand karo jabke wo tumhare liye buri ho. Allah jaante hain, tum nahi jaante.”
(Surah Al-Baqarah 2:216)

Ek Dua Jo Tum Kar Sakti Ho

“Ya Allah, mujhe ek aise humsafar se nawaz jo meri aankhon ki thandak ban jaye, aur hum dono milkar ek aise ghar ki buniyad banayein jismein teri rehmat, sukoon, aur barakah ho. Aameen.”

Chahe intezar lamba lage…

Lekin usey meaningful banao.

Kyunke Allah har cheez ke peeche ek hikmat rakhta hai.